Collaborative Divorce -- Robin Williams Sets a Good Example

Collaborative Divorce -- Robin Williams Sets a Good Example

By Rosalind Sedacca, CCT

We all know what poor role models celebrities can be when it comes to taking the moral high road. Divorce is an area that has offered too few examples of positive behavior, especially regarding issues affecting celebrity children. For this reason I am constantly seeking out those in the limelight who are, in fact, demonstrating positive alternatives because of their enormous influence in our culture.

Fortunately the world of divorce now has a new figure speaking out on the side of sanity and positive outcomes. The actor Robin Williams and his wife Marsha chose not to create a messy, expensive divorce battle in the courts, taking instead a responsible and respectful course of action for the sake of their children.

Even more impressive, Williams went public with his story on national TV shows, acknowledging his wife and emphasizing the importance of keeping it clean so that their children needn't suffer the consequences.

"I'm lucky... with someone like Marsha. We have amazing kids and it's not a slash and burn," said Williams when talking to Ellen DeGeneres. "I think a lot of times divorce can be like circumcision with a weed whacker," the comedian added, making a significant point in his own colorful style.

Here's the part that really deserves our attention - and recognition. The two made public their decision to create a written agreement outlining their goals and stating their intention to remain respectful of each other during the upcoming divorce proceedings.

Their agreement stated, "We will strive to be honest, cooperative and respectful as we work in this process to achieve the future well being of our families." Of special interest to me is the following statement in the agreement: "We commit ourselves to the collaborative law process and agree to seek a positive way to resolve our differences justly and equitably."

That means Robin and Marsha have chosen the Collaborative Divorce model which has received little media attention as an alternative to adversarial litigation. As a strong proponent of Child-Centered Divorce, I heartily endorse this decision and hope it will become an example for other couples facing divorce decisions when children are involved.

What makes a divorce "Collaborative"? In the simplest terms:

1. Attorneys and clients sign a written agreement to work toward settlement and not go to court.
2. Neutral experts are hired by the parties (financial, parenting, etc.) - no battle of the experts.
3. Parties agree to make a full and candid exchange of information - no hiding the ball.

Not every divorce case can be settled collaboratively, but if more couples were aware of this option and agreed to strive for the best interest of the entire family, how different long-term outcomes of divorce would be!

Robin and Marsha Williams had been married for 19 years and have two children together. No one wishes divorce upon any family, but the Williams' children are fortunate to have such caring, enlightened parents